Elusive Tooth Fairy

March 22, 2012

We have  a big problem in our house with the tooth fairy.  She has been very delinquent in her duties lately.  My 10 year old’s tooth fell out in gym.  It was so loose it basically jumped out of his mouth when he caught a ball.  The school nurse put it in a little plastic chest, taped it shut and sent him back to class.  When he arrived home he showed us his tooth and dutifully put it in the tooth fairy pillow.

Then he waited, and waited.  He waited so long he forgot to check each morning to see if she had come yet.  After about a week he said, “Mom, the tooth fairy still hasn’t come”.  I asked him if he had done anything to make her angry.  He said “I don’t think so…”

So where is she and where has she been?  Maybe now that he is 10 he is at the bottom of her list and she is busy the younger kid’s teeth…   I asked the kids where they thought she might be, but they had no idea.  We were wondering if she booked a flight on Direct Air and was stuck in Florida (badda-bing).

Finally after nine days, she showed up and left a $5 bill.  I think it was guilt money or perhaps your tooth accrues interest every day it sits and waits for her…

What is up with the tooth fairy anyway?  I can’t find a picture of her online and even Wikipedia has little information.  The section on her origins starts with a note that “this section needs expansion”.

Just what does she do with all those teeth anyway?  According to the Internet, these are possible scenarios for what the tooth fairy does with teeth:

  • collected, neatly labeled and filed away in a museum-like castle
  • put in special boxes and used for building things
  • ground up to make fairy dust
  • boiled until soft and make sugar puffs (???)
  • put in spray cans (that thing that rattles, that’s a tooth)
  • donated to people who are missing teeth
  • made into new teeth for babies
  • put into the sky and become stars
  • planted and grow flowers

I don’t know about you, but I will never feel the same about a can of spray paint…

I found a plastic day of the week pill dispenser in the top drawer of my husband’s dresser filled not with pills, but baby teeth.  So I think I know what she does with them in my house.  The bigger mystery perhaps is what does HE do with them…

There also is a big discrepancy from one house to the next.  Fairies seem to make up their own rules – the amount of money differs, some only leave coins and silver dollars, some spill glitter everywhere.  My daughter learned on the bus that if you leave a cup of water by your bed she will dunk her wand and the water will change color…

Our theory is that there are many tooth fairies assigned to different families.  We just so happen to have a cheap, forgetful one 🙂